You Only Live Thrice
by Jade-Lover2159
Summary: I, Isabella Marie Cullen have lived thrice. Once when I was born and once while I came face to face with death. The third? When I forgot who I am. A vampire. When the jade eyes of a five-year-old refused to let me break the gaze. My true self was reborn.


**I'm sick and tired of people considering RENESMEE CARLIE CULLEN as the world's cutest kid, okay? I'm here to prove ALL of the Renesmee fans out there WRONG. :D**

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**You Only Live Thrice**

**_Chapter 1 – Third Time's A Charm_**

I'd never regretted what I was. It was only gratitude that enveloped me, whenever I thought about my painful past. Whenever I thought about what I'd become. It bothered me little that pale faces would consider me a soulless monster if they knew the truth. The reality had saved me in a way or two. Not that I asked it to.  
The truth which was unbearable to accept; pleasing to the eyes on the outside; which when brought out into open is capable of leading to one's own downfall.

That's the same life which animals lead. You find a lion killing a deer. That's the typical process of predator and prey. But you never find a deer giving in. A deer willingly heading to the lion. Not aware of the fact that the action would cause irreversible consequences.

That's how nature created things in the first place. Take the cat family for instance. There are kittens which are adorable to cuddle with and lethal leopards. In better words, the pale faces and us. They're forbidden to know that we lure them to their death. But we seem intimidating to them that they make sure to maintain a distance.

What they _don't _know is that underneath that menacing leopard, there is mellowness. You don't honestly find a leopard killing its own cub.

They're abandoned from the truth that we don't want to be monsters. But their life would certainly be risked if they wanted to be near us.

Nature's hoax. That's what it was according to me. Even nature is so biased at times. Twisting the strategy of predator and prey. It's cruel really. So many people have faced fatality for what we are. The bitter end they did not deserve.

Maybe that's how it works. We are what we are only because we'd killed innocents.  
It's the nature's bounty. And our doom. That we suffer with no way out. We have no valleys of death, unlike the pale faces.

Most of my kind grows used to this life once they've mastered what they have to. They learn to not bicker about what they've become. Sheer stupidity. To consider themselves the head of the world. They gain nothing. Nothing compared to what the mortals enjoy. The elation and contentment which they experience would stand nowhere when compared to what me, a white demon had in life.

I didn't ask for this to happen, but there's no turning back now. The only way out would destroy my so-called family. I would be long gone if it weren't for them. They stood as a barrier to my demise. I flinched as I visualized their distressed faces and the tears which would never roll down when they knew I was no more. Affection. That was what stopped me from even thinking of such suicidal things.

All of this had occupied only one fourth of my mind as I leaped to pounce on my prey. Not everyone truly felt sorry for this action of our kind. But my lifeless heart only sank lower whenever my prey protested to save its life, with no avail. It reminded me of my distasteful past. I only visualized myself in the place of the prey. I vaguely remember my pleas as the soul reaper had advanced on me.

The wolf beneath me bellowed in pain, which only made feel all the more depressed. I made the process swift, unwilling to cause pain which the animal didn't deserve. The blood felt soothing against my throat. And it made me crave for more. See, this is what I hate about the way we live. Blood, blood, blood. That's _all _we wish for. It may quench my thirst, but it doesn't solidify the hatred which I had towards myself. I did not want to live a life of this sort; a monster's.

It was over in mere seconds. We had no right to do that. To rip off a living creature's soul. But that's how we thrived.

That's brings me to the moot point whether this eternal torment is necessary. I vowed to the spirits that didn't die a peaceful death that I was going to hunt no more for today.

I turned away from the lifeless animal and took to heels. I felt like a coward. Running away from what I am. Never in my wildest dreams would I envision myself as one of them.

_Dreams. _The word sounded bitter now. I would give everything which I had to trade my life for a human's.

Cool air hit me as I ran through the woods. Sure, you'd think lightning speed and supernatural powers would make the monster life worth it. But it was never like that for me. I detest everything this life has offered me.

I heard the heartbeat of someone. Surely, it belonged to a human. C'mon. I'm a vampire for goodness sake. Don't ask me asinine questions such as, "How do you know it's a human's heartbeat?" And I caught scent of something delicious, in a _very _non-food way. Something like.. honey. And lilac.

I stopped myself, intrigued by something as strong as that. I headed in the direction where it came from. I swear on Lord, I had _never _smelled something so.. stimulating and intense. I heard the rustle of leaves and the next second it turned into a loud thud.

I gasped audibly as I saw where it came from. I saw the dolorous curve on his face **(A/N : FYI, his frown :D)** which startled me for some reason. He was in a crawling position, like he'd _just_ fallen down. That must explain the rustling of leaves and the thud. I felt reluctant to go forward. I was what I was, after all.

There, in the midst of this dense forest, was a human child. About five years old. I held my breath quickly. I kept my distance too. Of course he was some twenty feet away, but let's not push his luck. How lucky! To be spotted by the world's most dangerous predator. How lucky, indeed. Heavy sarcasm, just so you don't misinterpret things. Not that I meant any of the 'how-lucky' things!  
I was dumbfounded as to what I was to do next. Where did he come from? How the hell could someone be so careless to leave their child _here? _In a forest? That's just a maniacal action! Maybe a bunch of hikers had left him here?

I was pondering over a hundred and one things when the child let out a soft cry.

I went all rigid and alert. Okay, _froze _would explain it. That one cry was enough to make my heart swell with emotions even God couldn't be able to name. I instinctively stepped back, not wanting to terrorize the poor kid. Where were his parents? If they'd left him here, alone, I hope they die an agonized death.  
Ok, where did _that _come from? I mean for goddamn sake, I've only sighted some human kid. I don't _know _anything about him.

He started wailing as I kept moving in the direction away from him. It made my heart ache and rejoice irrationally at the same time. Was he hurt? Or the reason for the waterworks was that I was moving away from him? The sobbing became more prominent. So, I gave up. I moved forward and knelt in front of the kid. As berserk and unsafe an action that was, I just couldn't endure standing there and watch him snivel all day long.

My supernatural vision must have failed me or something. Only now did it dawn on me that the little boy in front of me had a face which was just too cherubic and captivating to resist. And his eyes? Did you know emerald was my new favorite color? He quieted down a little and I smiled at the thought that he wasn't having a panic attack at our proximity.  
Of course, he wasn't. He was human. We appeared to be radiant and statuesque on the outside. It was just that I'd kept thinking of myself as a monster to the extremes, that I saw myself as a hideous creature with pointed talons and three-headed or something.

"Hello, little one." I finally said. I was no good with kids. Hey, I didn't take up baby-sitting lessons to know how to communicate with a toddler. He stared back with water-filled eyes and I had to resist the urge to brush his tears away.

"Are you alright?" was my next concern. He was crying, right? Poor kid..  
He jutted his bottom lip out with a heart-wrenching expression on his face. He shook his head.

"What happened?" The tears in his eyes were threatening to fall down and for a moment I forgot what I was; reached forward and brushed his tears away with my right hand while cupping his cheek with my left. He didn't seem to shy away from the coldness. That's.. a first one?

"I fell down." He sniffed as he tried to get up but failed miserably. His hands only seemed to hurt him. Which gave rise to another round of tears..  
Truth be told; I wouldn't have tolerated any other kid who just kept breaking down without a pause. But waves of pity lapped over me at the sight of him like this..

"Hush." I shushed him. "It's alright." I caught him by the waist and lifted him so that he could stand. His jeans were tattered as he'd fallen down; no wonder about that. I lifted his palms by degrees and examined them. They were thoroughly bruised. Other than that he seemed unhurt and whole.

"Are you hurt?" I questioned him anyway. My right arm was still wound around his waist. It was absurd how I hadn't noticed earlier that it gave me a not-so-ratiocinative feeling of complacency. His warmth did that to me. But _I _had no clue what _my _coldness did to _him._

"My arms hurt." He said etiolated, choking on the last word. I felt _so _sorry for him that I pulled him into my arms cautiously so that I didn't hurt his elbows. He remained muffled as he tucked his head in the crook of my neck and I stroked his back comfortingly. Their parents must have had some mental malfunction to leave him like this. Was it possible that someone had kidnapped him? But _why_?This is just one vicious and tyrannical action.

A few seconds passed and he finally reconciled. So, I slightly tugged at his head so that he'd look up. His bronze hair was disarrayed, yet completely soft as feathers. Just like any other human baby's hair. Not that I'm talking out of personal experience; yet.

Shut up, I'm not doing anything wrong. It's just.. basic courtesy to provide comfort to that kid. Put yourself in my shoes and swear on all that's holy that you _wouldn't _be doing what I'm doing.

"How did you get here?" Okay, okay. I've been itching to know how he ended up here, so don't blame me if I did most of the talking. I. Am. Not. At. Fault.

"I don't know... Mommy and daddy had a b-ii-g fight! So mommy asked me to go stay with Justin. The both of were supposed to go camping. We set up the tent and all of that.." He stopped. I waited, showing no sign of impatience. I liked the way he said _big_.. It was um, how do I explain it in a non-girly way? Lovable? Yeah. At least the word's better than '_cute'. _

"I don't know what happened. I don't know how I came here! It was like I was asleep and then I woke up to see ginormic trees." He said completely flustered and panicked. Okay, it wasn't like I _wasn't _expecting him to talk or anything. But hey, I haven't talked with so many kids and his fluency left me nothing short of bemused. He _appeared _to be four or five. And ginormic trees? I resisted the urge to chuckle. Of course they seemed humongous to him.. He was little.

"And Justin is..?" I prompted.

"My big brother." He completed, his voice ringing with idolization and wistfulness.  
Okay, so he and his brother were out camping. He didn't remember anything after that? Am I missing something like a kidnapper driving him unconscious? But why did the person have to just leave him here? Things seemed so abrupt and fishy around here..

There was a brief pause before he asked me something, rather shyly.

"Can I ask you something?" He said looking from beneath his eyelashes. If I'm gonna explain it to you it turns into a 'you-had-to-be-there!' moment. I mean really.. He looked kind of archangelic, peeking from under his eyelashes. And avoiding eye contact; avoiding me from meeting his innocent little eyes. Um, I guess it's the parents' obligation to tell their kids to take things with a pinch of salt while conversing with a stranger. Perhaps, that's why he seemed to be a bit shy. Nevertheless, ethereal. The picture in your head and its otherworldliness wouldn't be one fourth of what I'm seeing.

"Yeah?" I asked him, cocking my head to my right side.

"What is your name?" He asked rather dubious as to if he must have asked that or not.

Oh, how nonsensical of me to have not formally introduced myself!

"I'm so sorry! I must have told you that before asking you anything else. I'm Isabella. Isabella Cullen." I extended an arm. The next fraction of a second, I saw the daylight of my action.

He shook it without reluctance. "I'm Edward. Edward Masen", he said and I was practically freaking out that he'd draw his hand back swiftly because my hand was refrigerated. Edward. For some reason he reminded me of Prince Edward, Giselle's Prince Charming from Enchanted. And the next second I found me mentally whacking myself for even comparing this little kid with that 30 something year old dude wrapped up in a medieval outlandish costume. And, _ew, _did he like _change _his costume in the movie? Scarlet and golden.. I dunno why wedding themes were brought up in my mind at the mention of such a combination.

He'd said his brother's name was Justin, right? But that's just off-color. Justin. Edward.

Edward. Justin. Brothers. Huh? That didn't fit.

"You can call me Bella." Isabella's cool from my perspective. But I'm just enamored of _Bella. _Between us; I'm self-obsessed.

"Bella." It sounded so much more convincing coming from him. "It suits you! A pretty name.. For a pretty girl." I broke into a grin at the mention of that. It looked as if the words had run off at his mouth; so he instantly became embarrassed. Hey, it's not everyday you receive a complement from an endearing kid!

"Aw, thank you", I said not wiping off my toothy grin. He sort of blushed.

"Can I be frank with something?" I asked mainly to drag him out of the bashfulness.

He nodded. "I know I'm a drifter and all of that.. But how will you go back home? And where's your brother, anyway? I could take you back home."

"I don't know. We set up out tent a around here somewhere.. That is the last thing I can recollect. I don't even remember falling asleep. I'm worried about Justin!"

"Are you sure this is the place he brought you to? And how long have you been sauntering around the forest?" Didn't anyone care to enlighten the kid about the fact that this forest was a habitat for wild grizzlies and wolves?

"I've never been so sure about anything. I dunno.. Probably half an hour.. I was trying to locate the tent and campfire. I just didn't know what to do and started to run frantically but slowed down when I saw that it only made me fall down. And then I ran into you.."  
He seemed to be speculating _too_ deeply about something.

_Please let him not be thinking about what I was doing here. Please let him not be thinking about what I was doing here._

"What if.. What if.. something had happened to him while I was away? Would he still be alright? Tell me!" He pleaded with puppy dog eyes that I felt guilty telling him something I was clueless about. It smoothened my ruffled brows that he never thought about what I'd expected him to. And it was kind of bizarre. He is in a cold sweat worried stiff about his brother. _Elder _brother. Heights!

I mean really, at least he must have the caliber to look after himself.. But Edward? I highly doubt that.

Thank God, (If you exist) for making me stumble across him. Don't you reckon the possibilities of him wandering alone in the woods can lead to _several _disastrous things?

"Tell you what. Firstly, let's get you out of here, Edward. Will you be able to lead me to your house once we get out of the woodland? Give your parents a chance to know that you're buttoned up and secure."

"But what about Justin?!" He protested and I placed a finger over his lip to stop him from jabbering more; only to cherish the feel of snugness and warmth at the place where my finger touched him.

"Quiet the king of worriment, aren't you? I'm sure he's free from danger. We'll look for him, okay? Trust me on this."

"You're wrong." He shook his head. But why? I mean, _sure_, I'm a stranger.. But he doesn't trust me? I sat, lost for words for at once. The choice is entirely his, right?

"I'm no King." He wrinkled his nose in disgust and continued with zeal, "I'm a Prince!"

At that, I had to crack up.

I ruffled his hair. "Alright Prince Edward, are you in any state of walking?"

He shook his head. For the first time in what seemed like a millennia I noticed that I was still kneeling down and stood up.

I took his hand.

"You said the place where you were supposed to camp was at close quarters. Any idea in which direction you started walking from?"

"I'm sorry. I don't remember. It made me feel dizzy. Stupid forest. Stupid same-looking trees!" I rolled my eyes at that. But internally reminded myself that he was young.

"So…" I said, wondering whether or not he'd deny the option of me carrying him.

"I thought you were going to carry me?" He flushed visibly.

"I was under the impression that you did _not _want me carrying you.." I admitted.

He sighed. But it felt more like giving in. "I can't walk. What else can I do?" I touched the tip of his nose with my finger. "That's the whole point, Edward. You don't _have _to do anything."

With that, I caught him by his waist and lifted him up. He had to buckle his hands around my neck and soon he was nestled against me. His scent was more prominent and the sound of his heartbeat made me feel like I was in Seventh Heaven.  
Like the previous time he tucked his head in the nook of my neck. I tightened my arms around him in a not-so-bone-crushing way as he fastened _his _arms around _my _neck.

For some reason, I comprehended that he was afraid. Of what, I don't know.

I wanted to rock him back and forth, mainly to shake his fears away. But at the moment, I was glad that he sought solace in my arms. I felt like I'd do anything to protect him and treasure the warmth and relaxation to hold him like that. Yes, I'd do it for longer than the eternity.

"Did you bring anything with you, Edward?"  
He snapped his head up and his eyes seemed to be calculating before anxiety burned in them.

"Yes, my backpack!"

"Well.. Do you remember when you had it with you last?"

"I… don't know! Oh, no! I lost it! That can't be possible -" I cut him off for the second time today by placing my hand over his mouth. And instantly his eyes turned softer and he gained back his serene façade.

"It has to be here, Edward. Jeez. Are you a control freak?" I raised one eyebrow.

He stayed silenced for a moment before answering. "Are you a questioning freak? 'Cause you apparently seem to be bombarding me with questions." I chortled aloud.

I shook my head and said, "Some boy you are, Edward." He simply grinned. What can I say, his happiness is contagious.

"You look like you could use a good night's sleep. Aren't you exhausted?" And as if on cue, he yawned and muttered a, "Very."

"Sleep, then. I'll wake you up once we're out of the woods. I'll only be carrying you anyway."

"Alright", he said and snuggled against me. "Just so you know, it' safe now. There's no crisis waiting on its wings", I said as I felt that he needed some kind of re-assurance.

"Wake me up if you spot my backpack", he said against my neck when his eyelids began to droop.

I smoothened his hair before, _very, very _briefly kissed his forehead.

"Thank you." He muttered and I knew it wasn't just for cradling him.

And so I began – I might add, _finally _–to walk. Quiet evidently you can't expect me to travel through the forest with _my _way. But that seemed unnecessary now. I felt no urge to rush through the woods. I was comfortable with human pace.

And as I walked, I noticed that the sun was setting. You know I _loathe _sunsets. Not that it hung sign on the beginning of the night, but well, it just seems so unfair that a day has to _end. _Wish they'd last forever, and trust me when I say I've never regretted – not once in my life – before this; the rise of twilight.

It seemed ironic, that all this time I was under the daylight. But not one ray of light had touched me when I'd talked with Edward.  
Did I just have a brain transplant or the world just stopped spinning on its axis? It has to be one of that or the luck seems to be on my side today. Ah well. There's a first time for everything, isn't it?

The rays which were thrown over the forest currently weren't as bright as a day's but it was more than enough to make my skin glisten. But the clouds of fear denied to creep over me, for Edward was sound asleep and made no movement. And as my skin shimmered –comparatively less bright- like it had been embedded with zillions of diamonds, I felt like my world had turned mystical. The glimmering cast rainbows – though you can't call rays of different colors shooting out from me due to the reflection of the sun as rainbows – all over the place.

The wild flowers, in a dozen colors – violet, blue, red, yellow and orange- swayed in the gentle breeze that blew past. It was one hell of a scene to watch.

I felt completely at ease as I listened to the synchronized thrumming of the now-asleep Edward's heartbeat. Suddenly, I felt like his _heartbeats _were filling my ears with such euphonic music. And that nothing could replace that wonderful rhythm.

I inhaled his scent deeply and relished the aura. Honey and lilac filled my nose. And I thought I wanted to do something I hadn't done in eons. Probably forgotten about it, you could say.

I forced the shield out of my mind; completely. Sure, you could say it was unnecessary seeing that there was no danger around. Danger or not, I felt like I was bound to protect him. Everything within 3 meters radius was under my shield. I didn't exercise my other power though. I, well, have quiet gotten the hang of it.

I smiled happily, at the sight of him and the path which life had paved for me.

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_Guess what? **Bella has another power!** And her shielding and the other power at times team up together.. to do stuff :D Any guesses?  
Her sister Leona, she TOO has a power.. _  
_See, they're biological sisters. More about Bella's history in the following chapters. _

_Oh, BTW, Edward's been adopted. More in the upcoming chapters about his family._  
_And what do you thing about the little Edward? Weird or sweet? You'd be used to seeing that 17-year-old vampire in ur heads, I'd bet!  
_

_Press the green button and lemme know! I dont intend to continue without your reviews! Or I'd probably think everyone hates this story :|_

**_~Jane/Janz

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**_Sneak Peek Of The Next Chapter : _**

If I receive some reviews on what you thing about the story! And whether I must continue or not! 10 reviews for the first chapter? BABY STEPS.. :D


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